The Law, P4
This blog post is Part 29 of a series entitled "From Fear To Freedom" by Pastor Jeffrey Dean Smith of Donelson First in Nashville, TN.
Message Date: September 29, 2024
Click here to listen to this message
In 1845, the State of Deseret, was a territory settlement in the western part of the United States. This proposed state was founded by the leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, or the LDS Church. Four years later, this Western territory applied for statehood in the United States. Their request to become a legal state in the greatest nation in the world was denied. Several years later, they applied once again only to be denied by the United States Congress. Over the course of the following 47 years, this territory would be denied statehood in America 7 times in all. It would not be until January of 1896 when Congress would welcome this western territory into the United States of America as the 45th state, the beautiful state of 5 national parks, including my favorite, Zion. The 45th state... Utah.
Why did the State of Deseret, which means the “state of the honeybee,” continually be denied entrance into our nation’s family? Polygamy. Congress would not allow this territory to be recognized as a true state of United States until the Utah Supreme Court agreed to insert a ban on polygamy in the state constitution. On July 13, 1894, the soon-to-be state of Utah officially banned polygamy. In support of this ban, the United States Supreme Court issued this statement shortly thereafter:
The idea of the family, as consisting in and springing from the union for life of one man and one woman, is the sure foundation upon all that is stable and noble in our civilization.
Murphy v. Ramsey
United States Supreme Court, 1895
The first recorded marriage in the continental United States was in 1565 in St. Augustine, which at the time was Spanish Florida. The marriage was a bi-racial union between Luisa do Abrego, a black man and Miguel Rodriguez, a white woman. In Massachusetts, though I doubt the law is closely followed today, a man must hunt and kill either 6 blackbirds or 3 crows before obtaining a marriage license. In South Dakota, first cousins cannot marry one another unless they both are over the age of 65. And in California, you do not have to be present at your wedding ceremony for the marriage to be legal. You can get married by proxy, which means that someone can stand in for you! And does this surprise you... in Kentucky, it is illegal for a woman to marry the same man 4 times. Three is the limit... so make the third one work!
Martin Luther said these beautiful words about marriage: “There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than good marriage.” I really like the ever famous quote on marriage from the movie The Notebook: “A forever love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds.” Queen Elizabeth said this about marriage: “After 50 years of marriage, I can simply say: ‘I am for it!" And Rita Rudner said: “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life!”
Historically, America has defended the establishment of marriage as one of her most fundamental positions. From where does our nation arrive at this truth? Well, whether realized or not, such a reverence for the marriage bed originates, simply, from God’s Holy Word.
Commandment #7: You shall not commit adultery.
Exodus 20:14
The word “adultery” appears 40 times in the NIV of the Bible. Did you hear this number? 40! This is absolutely intriguing and of no coincidence y’all... Moses was with Yahweh on the Mountain of God for 40 days. Elijah fasted for 40 days. The Israelites, as we are studying, will wander in the desert for 40 years. Ezekiel laid on his right side to bear the iniquity of Judea’s sins for 40 nights. King Saul, Israel’s first King, served as the King over Israel for 40 years. King David, the second King of Israel, served as King over Israel for 40 years. And his son, Solomon, the third king of Israel, served as King over Israel for 40 years. Goliath taunted God’s people for 40 days. God flooded the earth for 40 days. And our Savior, Jesus, at the beginning of His ministry, spent time with God fasting and praying for 40 days. There is a tremendously biblical, God-ordained order and significance in the number “40.” So for the topic of adultery to appear in God's Holy Word exactly 40 times obviously means the forbidden act of adultery is of extreme interest to God. So much so, obviously, that when Moses is given 10 commandments from God to share with God's people, adultery makes the list!
Adultery / Hebrew / v. / naap = to render poorer in quality by adding another
In the position of a holy union between a man and a woman, adultery is not merely an act of being unfaithful against one’s spouse. Instead, the act renders a marriage poorer in quality by adding a third person to the relationship. To fully grasp the magnitude of Commandment #7, requires a clear understanding of how God ordained the first marriage relationship between Adam and Eve. So, let’s take a look!
At the beginning of time on Earth, God ordains marriage as a lifelong alliance exclusively between a man and a woman. As a matter of fact, God wasted no time doing so. In chapter one of the Bible, God creates male and female and tells them together to bear children:
Genesis 1:27-28
Now I have been asked before: “Were Adam and Eve married?” Absolutely they were! And for all you men bachelors out there yet to be married... maybe consider a ceremony in the way in which earth’s first man got married. After a long day at work naming the animals, he simply awoke from a nap... and he had a wife!
Genesis 2:20-22
“Where?”, you ask, “...is the wedding ceremony for Adam and Eve recorded in the Bible?” Well... verse 23 is Adam’s vows to Eve:
Genesis 2:23
Verse 24 is God’s marriage ceremony charge to Earth’s first couple:
Genesis 2:24
And, then to make it official, God wants us to know that this couple, Adam and Eve, are married:
Genesis 2:25
We know this marriage union involved a sexual union because of, once again, the Hebrew. In Verse 24, God states that the two became “... one flesh.” Look at the Hebrew word for “one” found in Verse 24:
One / Hebrew / ehad = appointed joining; a union of two becomes one
And the Hebrew word for “flesh”: Flesh / Hebrew / basar = intimate; nothing but skin; genitals
Adam understood that such a union with his wife is the most intimate joining of two that involves the flesh of both becoming as one. So, in marriage, we see that God appointed the male and female to be as one intimately joined. And God ordains this intimate union of Adam and Eve as a design for marriage – one to be followed only in marriage! Another phrase I do not want you to miss is that statement again in verse 24:
Exodus 2:24 “... a man leaves his father and mother.”
This phrase projects a new beginning; one which implies that a new household is being established. In some translations of the Bible in Verse 24 we read the phrase that the man will “hold fast to his wife,” indicating that the man will be fully committed and united to his wife for all of time. The idea here is one of God intending that a marriage be a lifelong relationship, not a mere temporary agreement that can be amended or voided at will. In church, this is why we have continually discussed, and let me remind you, that the 10 Commandments God gave to the nation of Israel through Moses, are continuously confirmed in a variety of ways throughout the fullness of Scripture. Let me give you an example... In the book of Matthew, Matthew 19:3, Jesus was asked about divorce from the Pharisees. Look at how He responds:
Matthew 19:3-6
Do you see this? Jesus understood that the essence of marriage was established when God created them from the beginning and made them male and female and stated that the two would become one intimate flesh. This is why He specifically says, "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." Matthew 19:6
Jesus actually references the foundational verse on the first marriage between Adam and Eve that we just discussed recorded in the book of Genesis. The Pharisees, trying to trap Jesus by pushing the issue even more with Jesus. They ask:
Matthew 19:7
Look at how Jesus responds. His words clearly define God’s expectation for marriage:
Matthew 19:8-9
Jesus communicates two critically important thoughts about God’s views on marriage and divorce here:
1. Marriage is for a lifetime.
2. Divorce and remarrying is adultery.
Notice something extremely important that Jesus reveals: Adultery has nothing to do with sex! Do you see this? Jesus does not say, “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife and engages in the act of sex with another woman commits adultery.” No! He does not say this. This is truly interesting y'all because I think so very often we associate adultery with the act of sex. Now this may be the case in some situations. But Jesus makes it clear:
The sin of adultery is not merely the act of sex. The sin of adultery, at its core, is the act of one remarrying after one gets a divorce! Jesus make this abundantly clear on several occasions in Scripture.
This too speaks to the union of marriage that is so very important to God. Sex or no sex... God is most concerned about one ending a holy union, marriage, that is ordained and blessed by Him, and then, one choosing to unite again in marriage. Scripture makes it clear, that except for an act of sexual immorality on the part of an unfaithful spouse, such a union is not a holy union; such a union is not ordained and blessed by God; such a union is adultery. I want to discuss two important questions that often surface about adultery.
First, if adultery is wrong, then why does the Bible approve of polygamy?
In the Old Testament, polygamy was allowed by God. But we never read anywhere in the Bible where God encouraged the polygamist lifestyle. Polygamy was not considered adultery because the additional parties were legally married. Y’all probably heard the cute story about the two young boys who were at a wedding. One boy asked his young friend, “So, how many wives can a man have?” The young friend answered, “Well, if I am counting right, the Pastor just said 16! Four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer!” It does seem that whenever we read in Scripture where a man has more than one wife, trouble follows. One example, King Solomon:
He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray. As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been. 1 Kings 11:3-4
As we have already seen this morning in Genesis 1 and 2, polygamy was not a part of God’s original plan when He ordained the marriage union between one man and one woman. Nonetheless, for whatever reason, it appears God allowed such a practice for the short-term. Again, it is important to note, God never verbally approves the practice. Why? Why did God allow this practice? Well, with God, there is always a reason... nothing is ever coincidental nor accidental with God. If I were to speculate as to “why” ... having though about this often this week... keep in mind, in ancient societies, it was nearly impossible for an unmarried woman to provide for herself. Women were often uneducated and unqualified, and they often relied on family members such as fathers, brothers, and, once married, husbands for provision and protection. Unmarried women were too often subjected to prostitution and slavery.
So, God may have allowed polygamy to protect and provide for the women who otherwise may have been left destitute. A polygamist man could have taken multiple wives and served as the provider and protector of each of these women. While definitely not ideal, living in a polygamist household was far better than the alternative of prostitution, slavery, or starvation. Whatever the reason, God makes it clear in the New Testament of His expectations for humanity to follow His intentions for marriage which He clearly communicated at Creation.
Paul wrote to the Church in Ephesus speaking of the marriage bed as a commitment between one man and one woman. So, for whatever reason God allows for the “multiple wives lifestyle” in the Old Testament, the New Testament clearly articulates a message that runs parallel with God’s stated intentions for man and woman at Creation:
Ephesians 5:22-33
In the Greek translation of Ephesians 5, the words “wives,” “husbands,” “he,” “him,” “wife,” and “her,” all appear as singular words rather than plural. If polygamy were allowed, this illustration would be useless and void. The usage of such singular Greek words makes it clear that, when speaking of the family, God was clearly addressing a wife and a husband. So then... this leads us to another extremely important question as it relates to adultery:
When one divorces and remarries, is adultery committed?
This is one of those moments in Scripture, to which I alluded last week, that would be much easier for us to simply ignore or move past. I presume there is great confusion among so many on this topic, even some within the church, as to what is right in this area. Well... God’s Word is extremely clear on the issue of divorce and adultery. And Jesus leaves no gray area on this matter in the following two verses:
The Law and the Prophets were proclaimed until John. Since that time, the good news of the kingdom of God is being preached, and everyone is forcing their way into it. It is easier for heaven and earth to disappear than for the least stroke of a pen to drop out of the Law. Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Luke 16:16-18
Do you notice what Jesus speaks of before speaking of one who divorces their spouse and marries someone else? Listen to this passage again:
The Law and the Prophets were proclaimed until John. Since that time, the good news of the kingdom of God is being preached, and everyone is forcing their way into it. It is easier for heaven and earth to disappear than for the least stroke of a pen to drop out of the Law. Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. Luke 16:16-18
Do you see it? Jesus speaks of the Law - the Ten Commandments! And He mentions the Law twice! Again another reminder to us, Church... long after the recording of Exodus 20, God continues to remind us of these truths He handed down to Moses on Mount Sinai, His Laws. As we discussed last week, the exercise of studying the fullness of Scripture is such a healthy one for the believer! Look at what Mark records Jesus saying about this very topic in Mark 10:
Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery. Mark 10:11-12
Jesus is clearly articulating the truth that divorce does not circumvent the prohibition against adultery. If a married man or woman meets another person, falls in love, divorces a spouse, and then marries again, this person commits adultery. What is truly revealing about these two passages in both the book of Luke and Mark... the act of sex is never mentioned, is it? Never. Again, as we saw earlier in the book of Matthew, when Jesus was speaking with the Pharisees, we often associate the act of sex with adultery. And though, yes, a man or woman engaging in a sexual act with one to whom he is not married can lead to adultery, Jesus gives us clarity in these two passages that adultery can be committed without a sexual consummation in said relationship.
Of course, there are some cases where Scripture recognizes divorce to be allowed. In such cases, remarriage is also allowed without the guilty verdict of adultery. I will not take the time today to discuss in detail the biblical grounds for divorce and re-marriage. I have done so on numerous occasions with previous series I have taught here at DF. If you do seek clarity on this, I encourage you to watch the archive of our May I Ask A Question? Series from 2023.
Jesus clarifies this truth that adultery can be committed without a physical sexual act between two people when He makes this eye-opening statement in His wonderfully delivered message known as the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5. Look at what He said to His disciples:
Matthew 5:27-28
What Jesus is essentially saying, and what too is the definitive foundational principle of Commandment #7:
Adultery is ultimately a matter of the heart.
Though this commandment is for both male and female, notice here in Matthew 5:28 to whom Jesus addresses this profound statement:
Matthew 5:28
Men, this is for you and for me today! I would even carry this statement to this degree: There are two types of men in the room today: First, there are those men who will admit that at one point or the other, “I have struggled with lust.” And secondly, there are those men who lie about that struggle! Listen to the wisdom of King Solomon on the act of adultery that begins in the heart:
Proverbs 6:20-29
Solomon makes this final statement about this atrocious act in Verse 32:
Proverbs 6:32
After Jesus delivers such powerful words in the Sermon on the Mount, He finds Himself once again in a silly conversation with the Pharisees who ask Him quite the ludicrous question about hand washing:
Matthew 15:1-3
Boom! Now that’s a drop the mic moment! Jesus then says in Verse 7:
Matthew 15:7
And then, Jesus, explaining His words to His disciples too makes another damning statement about the heart and adultery:
Matthew 15:17-20
Jesus brings it back to the heart... and too back to the silly “hand washing” comment of the Pharisees. Man... Jesus knew how to think on His feet so very well; He was quite the wordsmith! So... y’all, there is so very much more to be said about this topic. But today we have discussed, foundationally, God’s ordination of marriage at creation between one man and one woman. When one marries, it's simple… God expects such a commitment to be for life… for life! For anyone who has struggled within your marriage on these issues we have discussed today, let me end offering to you hope!
Receive hope today and...
1. Refuse
This is a necessary step for both the one who has sinned and the one who is the recipient of a spouse’s sin. Anyone who has been hurt in some way by another, but especially by the betrayal of a spouse in some way, remember, refuse to hate; refuse to give up; refuse to not forgive!
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:32
I too extend this word “refuse” to the one who has committed adultery - - forgiving yourself is so very critical. Refuse to let guilt consume you. Refuse to let Satan continue to lie to you. Let go and find healing in the Lord who has already paid the price for your indiscretions, and for the indiscretions of us all.
2. Repent
Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord. Acts 3:19
Repentance is not merely the admission of wrongdoing. Instead, it is the renewal of a heart choosing to hate one’s sin so very much and return to the right way of living never again to look back.
3. Renew
The God who ordained the marriage bed at Creation as Holy desires to manifest within your marriage a renewal once again – as two become one! This renewal... “bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh...” can once again be yours as you allow the Lord to renew within your heart a confidence and commitment that is resolute like that of an acorn planted in the ground being renewed as it grows; day by day; hour by hour; minute by minute. This will happen as you water this seed within your marriage. Soon, an unshakable, steadfast and strong oak tree will once again make deep roots; being established within your home as you allow the Holy One to unite you both - one man, one woman, for all of life.
_________________________________
Jeffrey Dean Smith is a husband, father to Bailey & Brynnan, author, and the Senior Pastor at Donelson First in Nashville, TN. If you are in Music City, meet Jeffrey and enjoy iced tea on the front lawn each Sunday at 10:30a.